False Images-Real Conflicts

It is extremely difficult to see the reality as it is. Stephen R. Covey, the author of “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” said, “We see the world, not as it is, but as we are──or, as we are conditioned to see it.” We are conditioned to see the world based on the mental pictures, we have created for our own selves, other individuals and the society in general. All our conflicts arise due to our wrong perceptions of these due to our erroneous images.

In the article “Whatis Preventing Our Clear Thinking?”, it was discussed that when we meet even an unknown person,  we see the person from multiple lenses like Name, Surname (Caste/Family), Religion, Country, Region, Educational Qualification, University etc. There are many other factors like sex, cloths, appearance, height, weight etc which further distort the image.

The problem with images of the reality is that they are not false but actually have some truth in them. When you take a image (picture) of a person, it is not false. Yet, it is true only for that moment from some angle and captures the feature/mood of the person in that moment. The image does not change even after years while the person is changing every movement.

Let us analyze some factors that cloud our understanding due to creation of images.

1: Image of self- We all have created an image of the self based on the same factors by which we create images of others. These images can be positive or negative. For example, surname representing caste/family may be a factor which may give you a feeling of superiority or inferiority. We are all conditioned from our childhood to consider our religion as the best, our country to be the greatest and our culture to be the ideal. This convincing is done through highlighting the positive and best things from what is belongs to us and at the same time focusing the negative traits of what belong to others. As we grow older and develop capability to develop our own images, our mind plays the same trick with our own selves. We think too much of our positives, suppress our negatives while we do just the opposite for others. This makes us feel good as we gain self confidence and desire to achieve great things in life. Some experts call such type of thinking “Positive Thinking”.

2: Image of others:  We also make the image of others by the same brush as we make ours. When we like someone due to some attribute like beauty, education, style, family background, or intelligence, our image of the person become bright and we attach almost every good thing with that person. We do just the opposite for the person whom we do not like. So we see some people better than us and feel inferior and see others as worse and feel superior.  Rarely do we see people as they are.

3: Image of Society: In the earlier times, when the media was not there, we knew the people personally and made our judgments about people based on our personal experience with the person. In tribal and rural areas, it may still be done on the same way. However, in the modern world, we know very limited people personally but know almost the entire world through others. With the advent of electronic, print media, internet and social networks today, we see much bigger world and we develop an image of group of people based on country, region, profession (politics, businessman, government officials etc.), culture etc. Since these images are based on the perception of others/media and not by direct experience, we pay the price for their error of judgment. Since the media is interested in sensation to increase their viewership and the negative news sells better than positive, we often see the negative sides of the world only with occasional glimpse of the good side of humanity. The image of all sections of the society, (except the one which we actually belong to and have the benefit of direct interaction with the people), are negative. However, the group which we belonged to is based more on reality as it is from direct perception not tainted by additional perception of the others.

Conflict of Images

Most of us build images of the self, others and the society which are far away from the reality. Yet the error is not uniform. Most of us have much positive image of ourselves, positive image of people whom we like and negative image of people whom we dislike. Similarly, we have much better image of the society/group/sub-group which we belong to and much negative image of the rest.  This result is the prevalence of conflicts in the society.

At the individual level, when we have positive image of those whom we love, we want to see only good qualities in the person. We have very high expectation from them whether they are our spouse, children, parents or the leaders whom we admire. So we can’t tolerate their shortcomings at all and quite disturbed when they fail to live to their image. In the same way, we condemn the people or group which we hate. Since we are not in a position to change them for better, we feel frustrated and angry. We are unable to see any good thing in them and dismiss all their good deeds as illusion.

Reducing the conflicts

Once we understand that the root cause of conflict is the type of images we carry for everyone, we can also find ways to resolve the conflict. We can easily see that we paint the picture of others by the same brush from which we draw our own image. So if we are proud/ ashamed of our caste/religion and have an image of caste/religion for the self, we can’t avoid the caste-religion-image of others. Hence, we must first eliminate this colour from the self image from our own mind. In the same way, if you have a great image for your country and you are a nationalist, there is no way, you can avoid the image of others based on their nationality. The image of education/University too can take root only when you consider that as an important factor in your life. Otherwise you can also see that many great saints, wise men and even great scientists like Thomas Edison or great entrepreneur like Bill Gates or Steve Jobs had no affiliation with any great university.

We have to first break all the images of our own selves before we can think of breaking image of others. Every colour of the image that you drop for the self (like caste, religion), you do the same for others. Finally when we have no image of the self, we have no image for others and then we develop the vision to see the reality as it is as we have become self-realized by connecting to our deepest self-Atman or Self which is the spark of (the same) God and all differentiations disappear. At this stage, all conflicts are eliminated forever. We know yourself clearly and that give us the vision to see the world clearly.